Courage Fear and Embarrassment

In war, what is courage? Does it mean that you are not afraid to kill a man? Not afraid to die? Or is going to war cowardice to begin with? In The Things They Carried, Tim O’Brien considered not going to the war at all. Instead, he wanted to run away from it all. However, sitting out in the boat in the river, he realized that he did not have the courage. The passage with all of the faces in the river calling to him was probably one of the most powerful for me. Here, we see characters we have yet to be introduced to and Tim’s internal struggle with himself. He was so unsure of what would be the courageous thing to do. To him, going to the war was an act of cowardice for not being strong enough to get away. It was also cowardice to run away from people the people whose lives you may change or save. Does it take more courage to run from war, or is it harder to fight?
A quote that really stuck out for me in this book was about fear. "They were afraid of dying but they were even more afraid to show it" (O’Brien 20). In war, once you are there, it is all about being tough, and being able to withstand what you are faced with. If you are afraid, and another member of your platoon sees, you are no longer the strong "warrior" that everyone expects you to be. Also, if someone else sees your fear and admits to it too, slowly, one by one, your platoon weakens. To them, showing your fear weakens your strength and your hopes.
In the Vietnam War, most of the soldiers were only kids just fresh out of high school. They barely got a taste of the real world before they were shipped off, and more than likely, killed. They all wanted to act as courageous as possible, but to most it was just a lie. How can people so young truly believe that they are ready to die for a cause that many of them are unsure of? I believe that if they are afraid, they have every right and reason. Showing it however, is their own battle.
I recently talked with a U.S. Marine about how he felt about courage during a time of war. What he said really related to the scene in the book where Kiowa dies and all of the men involved feel responsible. The Marine said that in times of war, especially if the bond between soldiers is close, one man would put his life on the line without a second thought for another soldier. When Kiowa died, all of the men took responsibility for the death, especially Norman Bowker, who eventually committed suicide. Because of his bond with Kiowa, according to the Marine I spoke with, he could not live with himself for being to weak put his friend’s life before his own. Another thing that this Marine said to me was that "Fear lets you know your alive." I thought that this related a lot to the novel as well, because when those boys were out there fighting for their lives, I would think they would need some sort of reminder that they’re alive when people all around them are being killed.
Anyway. Back to my original question, what is courage in war. I think that killing a man is cowardly, because I also feel that a lot of wars are unnecessary . But that’s just me.